Handy Conversions (horrible pun warning)

Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter: Eskimo Pi
2000 pounds of Chinese soup: Won ton
One millionth of a mouthwash: One microscope
Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement: One bananosecond
Weight an evangelist carries with God: One billigram
Time it takes to sail 220 yards at one nautical mile per hour: Knot-furlong
365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it's less filling: One lite year
16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone: One Rod Serling
Half of a large intestine: One semicolon
1000 aches: One kilohurtz
Basic unit of laryngitis: One hoarsepower
Shortest distance between two jokes: A straight line (think about it for a moment)
453.6 graham crackers: One pound cake
One million microphones: One megaphone
One million bicycles: Two megacycles
2000 mockingbirds: Two kilomockingbirds (work on it...)
10 cards: One decacards
One kilogram of falling figs: One Fig Newton
1000 cubic centimeters of wet socks: One literhosen
One millionth of a fish: One microfiche
One trillion pins: One terrapin
10 rations: One decoration
100 rations: One C-ration
Two monograms: One diagram
Eight nickels: Two paradigms
Three statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital: One I.V. League